The Certified Zombie Hunter
August 31st, 2009
Connecting to server…
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
A word of advice: “asl” is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!
Stranger: I’m a certified zombie hunter.
You: oh wow me too!
Stranger: I… Really?
Stranger: What’s your mele weapon of choice?
You: depends if its the slow shambling zombies an average crowbar but if its the freaky running ones then nunchucks
You: yourself
Stranger: Nunchucks?
Stranger: What the fuck?
Stranger: and an ax would be the best
Stranger: Crowbar is going to take alot of force to achieve penetration, so you’re talking 10-20 swings until you’re tired.
You: alas you caught me out
Stranger: if you work with the momentum of the ax you can work for a good hour.
You: im not certified :(
Stranger: I knew it.
Stranger: You know you amateur zombie hunters are a danger to the community
Stranger: what if someone was relying on you? Huh? They would die because you don’t have the expertise to maximize survial chances.
You: I never thought of it that way before
You: i shall quit my amateur zombie hunting !
You: and hire a professional
Stranger: Because now you know
Stranger: AND KNOWING IS HALF THE BATTLE!
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
Submitted by karl1991 from England
(60 votes, score: 4.40)
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Overall, shotgun is best at close range with a close second of chainsaw. But not on the flaming ones!!!!
M14, machete. Done.