I Have Virus

May 29th, 2011
No comments
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: hello
You: asl?
Stranger: I will single handedly destroy omegle
You: how?
Stranger: I have a virus
You: hiv?
Stranger: This place is going down
You: that sucks
Stranger: COMPUTER VIRUS DIPSHIT
You: do you have an assful of weight loss?
Stranger: I will transfer it to the website at 1200 AM Pacific Time zone
You: i honestly don
You: don’t understand how you expect to give aids to a website
You: i assume it’s through dirty needles or ass sex
Stranger: I really Hope you dont enjoy omegle *End Transmission*
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Submitted by Natalie from USA

Author: Categories: Conversations
1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (18 votes, score: 2.94)
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The Pool Boy Had a Dip With His Tip

May 29th, 2011
1 comment
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: im sorry i slept with the pool boy!
You: it’s inexcusable!
Stranger: but i love u bb.
Stranger: dont leave me.
Stranger: it wont happen again
You: how am i ever supposed to trust you when you’re sleeping around like that?
Stranger: ever…
Stranger: im sorry bb.
You: oh, of course it won’t. that’s exactly what you said the last eighteen times.
Stranger: i just needed one last fling before we get married.
Stranger: it didnt mean anything baby
Stranger: not like with you
You: you still expect me to marry you? i’ve been completely faithful to you, and look what it’s gotten me!
Stranger: baby! if i dont have you. i dont kow what ill do.
You: well you might want to figure that out.
You: and stop calling me baby. i am /not/ your baby anymore.
Stranger: dont do this to me.
Stranger: i wont live without you
You: then why are you still alive? i don’t want you anymore. i can’t bare the thought of being with you. even the sight of you makes me sick.
Stranger: but im wearing that little black dress you like :)
You: that little black dress is disgusting. it’s too tight and really accentuates all of your fat rolls. and every time you’ve asked if something made you look fat, i lied. lay off the chocolate.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Submitted by Taylor from USA

Author: Categories: Conversations
1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (25 votes, score: 4.64)
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Casual Questions

May 29th, 2011
No comments
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hiiiii
You: may i?
Stranger: what?
Stranger: wait
You: poke your face
Stranger: how do u urinate?
You: through my pen0r
Stranger: what are u writing?
Stranger: where are u from?
You: i am writing words
You: i am from england
Stranger: bye
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Submitted by Brad from England

Author: Categories: Conversations
1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (10 votes, score: 4.20)
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Can You Fedex Your Tears Please?

May 29th, 2011
1 comment
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: rough sex?
Stranger: noo
You: Why not?
Stranger: cuz im not that kind of girl
You: Well would you prefer it sensual and gentle?
Stranger: no
Stranger: i dont like that
You: rough and hard?
Stranger: u are just gross
Stranger: eww
You: how about soft and with a pumpkin?
Stranger: eww
Stranger: geez
You: Fine. Just me and you can watch from outside while cleaning the windows with windex.
Stranger: no
You: What do you suggest then?
Stranger: nothing
Stranger: cuz u are just groos
Stranger: gross*
You: I love it when you make mistakes spelling.
You: It’s so hot.
Stranger: f u
You: I still have that pumpkin..
Stranger: F U!!
You: Why baby, I thought we had something?
Stranger: ughh
Stranger: im telling my mom
Stranger: and my dad
Stranger: so u better back offf
You: I like where this is going..
Stranger: what kind of effin person r u
You: One that has a pumpkin and doesn’t mind your mom and dad joining us.
Stranger: u type slow
Stranger: btw
You: “Mum, dad, spot of tea?”
Stranger: haha
Stranger: u type REALLY slow..
Stranger: hahaha
You: Does my slow typing turn you on?
Stranger: no
Stranger: it really is nerdy
Stranger: haha
You: You like where this is going, don’t you?
Stranger: no
You: Want me to type slower you filthy whore..
You: Does it turn you on when i slowly press the space bar?
Stranger: go ahead!
Stranger: call me a whore
You: I don’t want to be rude.
Stranger: well you called me that earlier
You: Are your mom and dad here yet?
Stranger: stop making me cry
Stranger: F U!!
You: can you bottle those tears and fedex them to me?
Stranger: u wish
Stranger: but nah
Stranger: i dont want to give it to a little bitchy person
Stranger: hah
You: Aww.
You: I would have cooked you a nice dinner.
You: I’m semi-romantic like that.
Stranger: i dont want a nice dinner
Stranger: i can make one by my self
Stranger: i dont need u
Stranger: i have parents u know
You: Fine, can I get some of that dinner?
Stranger: nope
You: I had some of those.
You: How old are you?
Stranger: i dont want to tell u
Stranger: cuz you are horny
Stranger: hah
Stranger: ewww
You: If you’re 54, that’s fine.
Stranger: nope
You: A little wrinkley, but the whiskey will help me with that.
Stranger: im older
Stranger: im 78
You: 54 is my hard limit. Don’t let your parents catch you on omegle
You have disconnected.

Submitted by B from Canada

Author: Categories: Conversations
1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (32 votes, score: 4.72)
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Replying to Sarcasm Fail

May 29th, 2011
No comments
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Male!
Stranger: hi did you play runescape
You: Once
You: And I almost shot my face off with a bat.
Stranger: i can`t shot you in ure face
Stranger: daa lol
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Submitted by B from Canada

Author: Categories: Conversations
1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (7 votes, score: 2.00)
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