You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: there’s landmines around here
Stranger: don’t make any sudden movement
You: what about susan the oversized gerbil?
You: shes making her way over here right now!
Stranger: Well I regret to inform you that susan the oversized gerbil is indeed a WALKING LANDMINE!
Stranger: FUCKIN RUN LIKE YOU GOT NIKES ON
You: but i gave them to susan for dinner!
Stranger: WOW WE ARE SO FUCKED! Do you realise what a gerbil can do after it eats Nikes!!
Stranger: IT CAN EJACULATE AT HYPER SPEEDS!
You: dear god no! think of the children at the elementary school inconviniently located next to the landmine!
You: theyre not ready to see such a delivery of inedible mayonaise
Stranger: YOUR THE ONE THAT’S TRAINED FOR THIS!!!
Stranger: I JUST WATCH TRUTV
You: commence the throwing of knives at the adorable gerbil!
Stranger: OH SHIT, IT’S ELIZABETH, SUSAN THE OVERSIZED GERBILS FAT SISTER!
You: send the children into the minefield, and theyll set off a chain reaction of landmines being set off that will reach elizabeth and take her out!
Stranger: But how can we reach the children from here and then convince them to JIHAD in time!!
Stranger: I didn’t sign up for this when I bought this 3d hdtv!!
You: yell to them that theres a free gerbil that if they catch they can keep!
You: and that theyll get CANDY once they get it
Stranger: I FORGOT MY MEGAPHONE IN THE SCHOOL!!
You: wait…you watch trutv?
You: gerbils hate that channel!!!
You: start reciting themesongs from shows on that channel
Stranger: I think it’s working!!! *bad boys bad boys whatcha gonna do*
You: WATCHA GONNA DO WHEN THEY COME FOR YOU!
You: elizibeth is beginning to scream in anguish
Stranger: But HOW!! Everybody knows she uses a voicebox!!
You: oh shit, it must be the voices in my head caused by radiation leaks coming from the powerplant next to the school!
You: wait! thats how the gerbils are becoming large
Stranger: I think I know what to do… We need Criss Angel to make her disapear!!
Stranger: Well like this, MINDFREEEEEAK!!!
Stranger: *criss angel leviates in*
Stranger: Criss Angel: Hey guys point to the camera, i don’t know you right? no i don’t and you don’t know me
You: absolutly not, ive never met you before today
Stranger: Criss Angel: good good now watch this as i concintrate my mind, body, and soul
You: wait what? i thought htis guy was legitimate?
Stranger: HE is he is we just need to add a little editing int this and we’ll see you in a week!
You: but wait? what about the giant gerbil?
Stranger: Elizibeth?? She’s just a prop.
You: wait,….. and the landmines?
Stranger: Did you think those were actually real? They were made by Rubbermaid
You: there was no powerplant or school or gerbils or landmines, or chris angel
You: im just a schizo creating a stranger in my head to talk to
Stranger: Well how did you think we got into this crazy house?
Stranger: The one right over there? huh?
Stranger: You are confussling me
You: oh yes…. of course *complacently agrees with voice in head*
Stranger: so if you are crazy?? what am I?
You: a construct of my imagination? or perhaps mariah carey?
Stranger: Wait a second… this isn’t Fight Club is it?
You: where is robert paulson?
Stranger: Well he died in the landmines remember??
Stranger: He was allergic to rubber
You: but we must remember
You: his name was robert paulson
Stranger: *where is my mind starts to play*
You: your mind is playing?
Stranger: Yes silly, my mind is Placebo
You: the implications are mindblowing
You: you have substance, but no influence!
Stranger: Well I guess we are all fucked!!
You: well this conversation has been nothing other then enjoyable, but i must goto sleep
You: have a wonderful night, and thank you for this adventure
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