Mother And Daughter Bonding
March 1st, 2010
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: hey mom.
Stranger: hello son
You: but i’m your daughter… do i really look that much like a man? WHY AM I CURSED WITH THIS BUSHY BEARD ON MY FACE!?!?! WHY!?!?
Stranger: years and years of inbreeding
You: why did you have to have me with your brother mommy?
Stranger: well you see
You: uh oh…
Stranger: im too large to leave to house
Stranger: so johnny is the only man i can love
You: obesity has caused you too much pain, mother. father is your brother. that is disgusting. mommy.
Stranger: im sorry honey
Stranger: but we cant do anything about it now
Stranger: were just gonna have to deal with it
You: but what about my future?
Stranger: your going to have to shave that beard if you want to attract a young man
You: many men friend request me on facebook and leave me nice comments on my photos, mother! they say they really like my beard and then they put “lol!” or “rofl!” which must mean they like me! :)
Stranger: aww honey….. that means…..
Stranger: that…. they like you… yes…
Stranger: your a beautiful young woman
You: oh yay! maybe i’ll have a husband one day and it wont be my brother or one of the 55 cats we have! :D
Stranger: dont you dare speak about the cats like that
Stranger: they are as much a part of this family as you or me
You: i’m sorry mother… i will go hug each and every one of them to apologize to them…
Stranger: good idea
Stranger: make sure you let them lick your face
You: hey mom, one of the cats scratched my eye out and ripped off my arm and now he’s foaming at the mouth…
You: what should we do?
You: wow he sure is hissing a lot…
Stranger: okay okay
Stranger: were going to play a game
Stranger: to fix your problem
You: oh i like games! :D
Stranger: lets see how many of these pills you can swallow in 30 seconds
Stranger: if you finish the whole bottle, you win!
You: oh man i love when you give me pills! they make me feel funny! :)
You: YAY GAME TIME!
You: one…
You: two…
You: three..
You: fourty seven…
You: fourty eight…
Stranger: yes…yes..
Stranger: your almost there!
You: fifty?
You: haha momayyy i feels sorta funny ins these head and tum tum! i like ponays…
Stranger: shhhhhhhhh
Stranger: now were gonna wrestle
Stranger: and your going to like it
You: oh i like wrestlingsss momay…
You: daddy wrestles with me a lot…
Stranger: oh he does?
Stranger: what kind of wrestling
You: yesh mommy and he calls it woozie wrestling…
You: i dont know what that means but now i’ve gained a lot of extra wait and puke every morning and feel weird things in my stomach…
Stranger: oh dear
Stranger: well now your truley a woman
You: oh yes! no husband required?
You: when i went to church yesterday, the priest told me i was carrying a blessing but i dont know what he meant… and then people kept saying congratulations to me. i think its because my beard grew another inch.
Stranger: i gotta go now, hilarious conversation
Stranger: ttyl
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
Submitted by Bearded lady from USA
(32 votes, score: 4.59)
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