Banana You
March 7th, 2011
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Official messages from Omegle will not be sent with the label ‘Stranger:’. Strangers claiming to represent Omegle are lying.
You: hey there
Stranger: hey there
You: your grandma wants you to call
You: you never call
Stranger: you’re right i never do call
You: it’s the least you could do
You: during the holidays
Stranger: it’s most likely because she is dead and the last time i checked dead people don’t have phones
You: hmmm
You: both of them?
Stranger: no just one but it was enough to reject your idea
You: no
You: i meant the other one
Stranger: no, i am sure you meant the dead one
You: how could you know that?
Stranger: how could you possibly know of the living one
You: it doesn’t matter
Stranger: yes it does
You: under a certain interpretation i am still right
Stranger: under a certain interpretation you are a banana
You: under a false one
You: under a certain, true! interpretation
Stranger: how do you know it is false?
You: i was right
You: because bananas can’t type
Stranger: how can you be 100% sure that something is true or not?
You: i can’t be
You: but how can you correspondingly be 100% sure something is false or not
You: ?
Stranger: then why are you stating something that is merely a guess as a fact
You: it was a fact though
Stranger: i am not saying anything is true or false
You: you are saying that, in fact
Stranger: you’re the one making wild accusations about people’s grandmothers
You: about my first statement
You: i am not making “wild” accusations at all
You: i merely pointed out
You: that you never call
You: which you eventually conceded that you don’t
Stranger: and i said i never call because she is dead
You: the other one
You: the other one
You: you don’t ever call the other one
Stranger: i never said that
You: and i’m going to assume that that is right
You: because you never bothered to refute me on that level
Stranger: i simply changed the direction of the conversation by saying that you were referring to the dead one
You: but i wasn’t
You: it was implicit
Stranger: how can i know that for sure?
You: apply this statement to whichever is applicable
You: in fact, if you had a great grandmother you never call, the statement could well have meant her
Stranger: you cannot simply make these assumptions
Stranger: you do not know how people would take the statement
You: i suppose on some level you are right
Stranger: also, what if both of my grandmothers were dead?
Stranger: then you would be completely wrong
You: but ads make assumptions way more specific and personal all the time
You: and you don’t write your local congressperson every time about those, right?
Stranger: i don’t agree with advertisement either
You: well
You: complain more
Stranger: besides advertisements are targeted at a group of people
You: people are foisting propaganda on you 90% of every day
You: whether you know it or not
Stranger: it’s pretty hard for them to do that when i don’t watch tv or listen to the radio
Stranger: and i can simply ignore them when i do
You: like if you watch 60 min., you get old ppl ads
Stranger: but this isn’t mass targeted advertisement
You: it’s in your pop music!
Stranger: you were making a single direct statement about one individual
You: yes
You: in a general way
Stranger: and you had no idea if that statement was true or not
You: also nascar
You: but it was true
Stranger: only partly
You: i have never wavered on my correctness
You: you just wavered on admitting it to me
You: how only partly?
You: it was about ONE person as you admit
You: and the statement was correct
Stranger: because i chose to use the dead grandma
Stranger: i made that statement false simply by thinking about it
You: not true
You: statements are true in reference to a specific reality
You: *specific, objective
Stranger: and i chose to interpret it with my reality
Stranger: making it false to me
You: but that’s sheer relativism
Stranger: but isn’t that what life is?
You: under your framework, there’s no way to decide i’m wrong according to me
You: so i’m still right
Stranger: everything is relative to each individual
You: it doesn’t matter if life is that
You: because that means you lose
Stranger: you are right to you, i am right to me
You: and you lose
Stranger: nope
You: yes
Stranger: nope
You: yes!
Stranger: nope
You: why nope
You: you obviously lost about 5 min ago
You: you’re just too sore to admit it
Stranger: ok let’s go back to the beginning
You: let’s
Stranger: you said i never call my grandma
You: yes
Stranger: i said she was dead, which would make it impossible to call her
You: but i said
Stranger: you never specified which grandma
You: but i said, it doesn’t matter
You: because…
You: it’s still true under a VERY PLAUSIBLE interpretation
Stranger: you can’t say it doesn’t matter just because it suits your needs
You: that is one step away from the first one
You: but thats what we do all the time!
Stranger: just because it’s MOST LIKELY doesn’t make it TRUE
You: normal conversation is FULL of these kinds of either or ambiguities
Stranger: so?
Stranger: assumptions are not always correct
You: so it’s unreasonable for me to deviate to your stupid framework
Stranger: because they are ASSUMPTIONS
You: under which i happen to be wrong for a SLIGHT TECHNICAL REASON
You: i was operating in social contract, conversational, normal english
Stranger: and i went outside that because it’s BORING
You: you were operating under SMART ALEK english
You: ok!
You: so!
Stranger: i really hope you aren’t going to say social norms are correct
Stranger: and anything that goes against them is wrong
You: no, but they serve as the only reasonable framework for juding here
You: esp. since they are pretty reasonable
You: and you haven’t made that the basis of any of your argument
You: like, “i’m right because the normal way of doing things is stupid”
Stranger: didn’t say they were stupid
Stranger: just boring
You: ok
You: i guess i’m boring
You: but also right
You: i can live with that
You: :p
Stranger: but look at it this way
Stranger: if i hadn’t made a wildly….un-normal assumption we wouldn’t have had this conversation
You: what assumption is that
Stranger: the dead grandma rather than the living grandma
You: yeah
You: exactly
You: it was un normal!
You: you admit as much!
Stranger: but not wrong
You: so what’s your point?
Stranger: this was the best conversation i have ever had on omegle and i sincerely doubt any future conversation could best it
You: me as well
You: good luck in the future, i hope we meet in a space colony
You have disconnected.
Submitted by Stephen from USA
(22 votes, score: 4.09)
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