Fucked By The Lord
February 23rd, 2011
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Official messages from Omegle will not be sent with the label ‘Stranger:’. Strangers claiming to represent Omegle are lying.
Stranger: Heeyy
You: Hello. I am your Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ. I am here to help you.
Stranger: How old are you?
where do you come from?
female or male?
You: I am a male. I have always been and I am from everywhere.
Stranger: please tell me, how old are you,and im a female by the way;)
You: I am the Father, the Son and the Holy Ghost. I have always existed. And I want to solve your problems.
Stranger: do you have problems or something? do you pray that much? wierdo!
Stranger: PLEASE TELL ME WHERE YOUR FROM ATLEAST
You: For starters, people pray to me. I am omni present. I am mother fucking everywhere.
Stranger: bye
You: Fine. I wont help you with your problems. Your loss.
You: I can’t get no respect.
Stranger: will you fuck me
You: You want to be fucked by the Lord. I would suggest a catholic church.
Stranger: FREAK, i dont wanna be fucked by you! i wanna get fucked by taylor lautner!
You: I would go to the nearest pet store and find a Husky type dog. A German Shepard might also work. I’m not much of a fan of bestiality though.
Stranger: hobo
You: I am homeless. But I am also an omnipotent being in no need of material possessions.
Stranger: how old are you? please tell me, my mum died 3 hours ago and im really sad. just 1 thing to chear me up atleast?
You: Wait. You are trying to get over your mothers death by trying to pretend to fuck Taylor Lautner on Omegle. Whoa dude. Whoa.
Stranger: my mum didnt really die 3 hours ago babe
Stranger: asl?
You: I know this. I am Jesus Christ an almighty being.
Stranger: bye
You: I love you my child.
Stranger: Eww
Stranger: how old are you?
You: 13.7 billion yrs old. I have been around since the big bang. I willed myself into existence. And how old are you?
Stranger: 16
Stranger: from england
Stranger: and female
You: I already knew that on account of the omniscience. That was a test and you passed. I am not impressed about you lying about your mothers death though. I created you better than that.
Stranger: fucckk off
You: Thats not very nice to tell off the creator of the universe like that.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
Submitted by Jason from Canada
(30 votes, score: 4.43)
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(12 votes, score: 3.92)