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Archive for February, 2011

Fucked By The Lord

February 23rd, 2011

You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Official messages from Omegle will not be sent with the label ‘Stranger:’. Strangers claiming to represent Omegle are lying.
Stranger: Heeyy
You: Hello. I am your Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ. I am here to help you.
Stranger: How old are you?

where do you come from?

female or male?

You: I am a male. I have always been and I am from everywhere.
Stranger: please tell me, how old are you,and im a female by the way;)
You: I am the Father, the Son and the Holy Ghost. I have always existed. And I want to solve your problems.
Stranger: do you have problems or something? do you pray that much? wierdo!
Stranger: PLEASE TELL ME WHERE YOUR FROM ATLEAST
You: For starters, people pray to me. I am omni present. I am mother fucking everywhere.
Stranger: bye
You: Fine. I wont help you with your problems. Your loss.
You: I can’t get no respect.
Stranger: will you fuck me
You: You want to be fucked by the Lord. I would suggest a catholic church.
Stranger: FREAK, i dont wanna be fucked by you! i wanna get fucked by taylor lautner!
You: I would go to the nearest pet store and find a Husky type dog. A German Shepard might also work. I’m not much of a fan of bestiality though.
Stranger: hobo
You: I am homeless. But I am also an omnipotent being in no need of material possessions.
Stranger: how old are you? please tell me, my mum died 3 hours ago and im really sad. just 1 thing to chear me up atleast?
You: Wait. You are trying to get over your mothers death by trying to pretend to fuck Taylor Lautner on Omegle. Whoa dude. Whoa.
Stranger: my mum didnt really die 3 hours ago babe
Stranger: asl?
You: I know this. I am Jesus Christ an almighty being.
Stranger: bye
You: I love you my child.
Stranger: Eww
Stranger: how old are you?
You: 13.7 billion yrs old. I have been around since the big bang. I willed myself into existence. And how old are you?
Stranger: 16
Stranger: from england
Stranger: and female
You: I already knew that on account of the omniscience. That was a test and you passed. I am not impressed about you lying about your mothers death though. I created you better than that.
Stranger: fucckk off
You: Thats not very nice to tell off the creator of the universe like that.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Submitted by Jason from Canada

Author: Categories: Conversations
1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (30 votes, score: 4.43)
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Hoers

February 23rd, 2011
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Official messages from Omegle will not be sent with the label ‘Stranger:’. Strangers claiming to represent Omegle are lying.
You: Adele
Stranger: yes?
You: I’ve been looking for you
Stranger: im a hoers
You: Pity about the dyslexia
You: You are a horse Adele
You: Not a hoers
Stranger: I R A HOERS
You: I should never have bought you off that farmer, twas a good trade for my magical beans though.
You: Silly illiterate horse.
Stranger: fuck you, you crazy, you think a hoers can talk? sure it was beans and not mushrooms?
You: You think you are a hoer.
You: That’s slightly crazier seeing as it doesn’t even exist.
You: Stupid quadroped.
Stranger: *quadruped
You: Alas, bested by a beast.
Stranger: Ph’nglui mglw’nafh Cthulhu R’lyeh wgah’nagl fhtagn
You: Cia
You have disconnected.

Submitted by Elsaurus from New Zealand

Author: Categories: Conversations
1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (11 votes, score: 4.45)
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Instant Conversion

February 23rd, 2011
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Official messages from Omegle will not be sent with the label ‘Stranger:’. Strangers claiming to represent Omegle are lying.
You: Say hi!
Stranger: bbbbbbbbbbbrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnsssssssssssssssss
Stranger: *moves in
Stranger: *bites arm
Stranger: *bites neck
You: *grabs shotgun, shoots*
Stranger: *eats yo brains
You: *dies, gets up again, becomes part of the horde*
Stranger: bbbbbbbbbbbbbrrrrrrrrrrrrrrraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaiiiiiiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnnnsssssssssssssssss
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Submitted by Zach from USA

Author: Categories: Conversations
1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (12 votes, score: 3.92)
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Troll Clash

February 23rd, 2011
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Official messages from Omegle will not be sent with the label ‘Stranger:’. Strangers claiming to represent Omegle are lying.
Stranger: listen then disconnet you rotten animal
You: How?
Stranger: my name is mohankok kris sterlouis i am from india me grandfather was the mayor of india
You: How?
Stranger: i have a wife and 3 childrean
You: How?
Stranger: mother gave birth to me
You: How?
Stranger: she did it with father
You: How?
Stranger: mother nautre
You: How?
Stranger: god
You: How?
Stranger: ur annoying me
You: How?
Stranger: by saying that
You: How?
Stranger: ur sexy
You: How?
Stranger: you tell me
You: How?
Stranger: ;0
You: H…ow?
Stranger: How?
You: ??????????????
Stranger: How?
You: ?????????????????
Stranger: How?
You: ??????????
Stranger: How?
You: ????????
Stranger: How?
You: listen then disconnet you rotten animal
Stranger: How?
You: my name is mohankok kris sterlouis i am from india me grandfather was the mayor of india
Stranger: How?
You: i have a wife and 3 childrean
Stranger: How?
You: mother gave birth to me
Stranger: How?
You: she did it with father
Stranger: How?
You: mother nautre
Stranger: How?
You: god
Stranger: How?
You: ur annoying me
Stranger: How?
You: by saying that
Stranger: How?
You: ur sexy
Stranger: How?
You: you tell me
Stranger: How?
You: It’s just how i roll ;D
You have disconnected.

Submitted by Janet from UK

Author: Categories: Conversations
1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (42 votes, score: 4.67)
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Llama

February 23rd, 2011
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Official messages from Omegle will not be sent with the label ‘Stranger:’. Strangers claiming to represent Omegle are lying.
You: -.-
Stranger: hi im a guy
You: lovely. I’m a llama
You have disconnected.

Submitted by Sarah from USA

Author: Categories: Conversations
1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (25 votes, score: 3.84)
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