You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: is it true false
You: Before we start, where are you from?
You: Male(probably), 22 seeks equally probable Female (19+) for vague flirting.
It is equally probable that I am a horny lesbian or bi girl.
You: So, yes, it is sort of true/false.
You: I’d say that was a pass
Stranger: well true lesbian dont come on the internet
Stranger: they stay in packs
You: It’s the internet. There are no women on here.
You: Wanna do some vague flirting?
You: I’m sort of touching your, err, arm or whatever.
Stranger: ummm i petting your hair
Stranger: thats good right?
Stranger: crap my ring is stuck
You: Don’t pull on it! you’ll make it worse!
Stranger: ok sorry about that
You: Now take me in a way that isn’t clearly defined!
You: Throw me on the floor! or not.
Stranger: ok i try to pick you
Stranger: awwww stub my toe
Stranger: why is that chair there
You: Yeah baby! I’m probably touching myself right now as far as you know!
You: The unclear purpose of that chair really makes me hot!
You: I didn’t even put it there! It’s from the kitchen!
You: It’s like someone might have been changing a bulb or something!
Stranger: well you should have moved it
Stranger: i undo my zipper crap stuck….little help
You: No, that things good and stuck.
Stranger: becare theses are new
You: oh if they’re new they probably just need a bit of WD40
You: hang on i’ve got some in my toolbox.
Stranger: wait they cost 50 bucks
Stranger: ok they had them on sale
You: Oooooooh now i’m stroking my heaving breasts and tweaking my perky nipples! You like that? Or I’m touching my cock if i’m a man which is equally probable at this juncture. Don’t worry though, i’m totally not.
You: I could be a sophisticated Turing Machine with an irresponsible programmer.
You: I’m getting off the subject.
Stranger: i am some toching my big penis which i could be lieing about
Stranger: most guys would i guess when they do this
You: Now my flatmate shows up unexpectedly…
You: I’ll let you choose the possible male/female status of the flatmate
Stranger: sorry i ate that apple heard it was your after th fact
You: he/she’s fine with it
You: however her fetish is tediously specific kinky chat…
Stranger: i ask her if wants to join us in the sex thats about to take place in the room a 11:30
You: you lightly stroke the upper region of the aereola on his/her left breast/pectoral through her blouse/his sleevless tartan lumberjack shirt with the first metacarpal of your right index finger.
You: she let out a moan around the 120hz frequency range
Stranger: I get my pants off about time mind you
You: I said I liked it vague
Stranger: i cover my ears my god
You: I hate it when I know exactly what’s going on.
Stranger: i look at you i might go down on you or i might make out with her for a while
You: In the confusion I think I *might* have cum, but i’m only, like 45% sure, so i’d have to check
You: like schrodinger’s cat, but with spunk
You: i mean lady juice, or whatever
You: you start getting it on with my flatmate
You: I wander off probably
Stranger: this never happens
You: happens to me all the time, she’s gorgeous
Stranger: can u get me a drink if your done?
You: they always go for her eventually.
Stranger: what u brits drink tea
You: I might have some Coors or Miller light in a cooler that i’m not sure exists.
Stranger: What is with you guys an tea any way
You: She’s playing Sousa’s Star-Spangled Banner on your junk while i’m gone
Stranger: i get borad of her an go finsh my self in your bathroom
You: Yeah, she’s pretty, but she can’t give head for shit.
You: I found a half bottle of Bud Light, it’s a bit flat, but it’s still good
Stranger: Your friend ok she’s still jut standing there
You: Yeah, she’s just an abstraction, she doesn’t really have a purpose outside of kinky vague-porn
You: Technically I think that makes her a sex robot.
Stranger: yea well cheers a
You: yeah bye or whatever.
Stranger: till next time maybe….most likey want remmber each other the whole You Stranger thing
You: I’ll always treasure the near complete lack of any details, and wish I could tell the story at parties.
Stranger: any reason to touch my self is good to me
You: It’s been like a porno version of ‘Memento’.
You: But without that chick from ‘The Matrix’
You: or that guy from ‘The Matrix’
Stranger: just wondering if i make me gay that might have cyberd with a guy just now
You: Or that other guy who was in ‘Home and Away’, or was it ‘Neighbours’?
You: Don’t look at me, you got a hummer from a sex-bot while I went looking for beer.
You: I can’t even be sure if I was touching myself!
You: This is kind of like ‘The Cube’ as well, in as much as I have no idea what’s going on.
You: No, it doesn’t make you gay.
Stranger: Boooom love that movie
You: The sequels are pretty good too
Stranger: theres a rd one
You: Well ‘Cube Zero’ is anyway
Stranger: this has te be the most random vhat ever
Stranger: Gay sex *mabye still not sure if your a guy* an nerd talk a…ll in one
You: The gift that keeps on giving…
Stranger: wait gay sex or nerd talk?
Stranger: I might want to change my life choice
Stranger: Your not with 4 chan are you?
You: Nah, just avoid putting yourself in situations involving quantum flux
Stranger: asshole killed the guy from the first in the first seen of the second Asholes
You: They clear up a lot of loose ends in the third one.
You: seriously dude, you’ll shit
Stranger: but any freind gota go get ready for work
You: It’s been a real pleasure.
Stranger: need a shower…..hot i guess i your a girl…..or if u in to guys what ever
Stranger: i shall miss this
You: hot and bi girl remember
You: don’t let anyone tell you otherwise
Stranger: good day may the chat god match use a agian
You: au revoir mon petit chou!
Stranger: our code word shall be cube