You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: Linden, I swear by my ancestors and the blood of my kin that I will break you and everything you love.
You: that would be difficult to do, i think
Stranger: Not in the name of justice
You: justice is a social construct
Stranger: Your Mom is a social construct
Stranger: Actually your Mom is quite nice
Stranger: She made me cookies
Stranger: Which wasn’t good because she caught fire and died
Stranger: But those cookies were damn delicious
Stranger: My pubescent voice was cracking with joy
You: hm. thats a funny story
You: belive it or not, i dont.
Stranger: Don’t like men?
Stranger: That’s open to debate
You: i dont like men, your right. it isnt open to debate tho. it is a fact.
Stranger: I beg to differ
Stranger: Because nobody can resist my body
Stranger: I haven’t seen many pectorals so well formed as my own
You: thats what you call a postulate. while that = true, you would be right. it can be prooven wrong, however
You: specifically by counter example
Stranger: As in, by the same method I used on you
You: no. i can empirically supply a counter example to your postulate. you simply supplied a unsupported postulate.
Stranger: Well when you claimed that you not liking men was a fact, I simply stated a counter-fact
You: there is no such thing as a counter fact. you need to supply evidence.
Stranger: I’ve got all the evidence right here baby, glimmering perfectly in the sunlight
You: no. thats an appeal to emotion. specifically, the one that you are claiming i have.
Stranger: You, however, only have unverifiable psychological assertions only backed up by your own claims
Stranger: Not able to be asserted by another human being
Stranger: I have unlimited evidence
Stranger: NOBODY can resist my body
Stranger: This can be proved
You: no you dont. there doesnt exist a limitless amount of evidence.
You: then show me the proof
Stranger: Show me any human being
Stranger: Show them my body
You: thats a demonstration. not a proof
Stranger: With enough demonstration comes proof
Stranger: Because my assertion is that EVERYBODY will like my body
Stranger: So I just need to demonstrate with everybody
Stranger: Until it is proved that there is not a single human who can’t
You: you cant. by the time you have, another person will have been born.
You: also, are you included in this? or are you the exeption?
You: can YOU resist yourself?
Stranger: It’s not gay though, it’s masturbation
Stranger: Well we simply stop anybody from being born ever
Stranger: Then wait till everybody dies
Stranger: And then nobody can resist my body
Stranger: Especially myself
You: that still isnt a proof, its a brute-force demonstration.
Stranger: But once the demonstration has been carried out, there is no way it can be disproved
Stranger: And all I need to do to prove it true
Stranger: Is to prove that I can’t resist myself
Stranger: Which is, as you said, a postulate
Stranger: Of course, I also have to prove that there is nobody else alive
You: ok, if that is the case, and you are the only one existant, your postualte would hold true
You: irl tho, apply godel
Stranger: Then I could repopulate the earth
Stranger: A manly plant though
Stranger: But not too manly to be embarrassed about asexual reproduction
Stranger: Actually more like a frog, because they’re both
Stranger: I suppose I’m a manplantfrog
You: if you are manly, then you have the characteristics of a man. ‘manhood’ implies sexual reproduction
Stranger: Which is why I went for the frog, because I can switch between both
Stranger: As in I can literally fuck myself
You: then its sexual reproduction.
You: ANYWAY. you still havent prooved the point you were attempting to make, which is taht i like men.
You: (which you are presenting as fact)
You: and i counter with an opposition and evidence
You: (ie, i have a girlfriend)
Stranger: I still haven’t seen any evidence that you don’t like men
Stranger: I’m not going to take the obvious route and consider the word “Like” literally
Stranger: But rather in a sexual manner
You: ok, so the given definiton of ‘like’ is ’sexually attracted too’
Stranger: This is going to be difficult, seeing as I have no evidence in your life to support it
Stranger: So I have to rely on the fact that nobody can resist my body
Stranger: So I will conduct an experiment
Stranger: Here is some data I recorded from an experiment:
Out of 250 people I met, 30% were women, 69% were men, and 100% couldn’t resist my body
You: i will go with the ‘normal’ postulate, which says any considerably ‘non-normal’ descriptor will be considered to be false until proper evidence is provided to the contrary
You: A- numbers dont add up, B- Trend does not imply absolute trend. (correlation/causation argument) C time??
You: also, possible bad test group?
Stranger: A- The other 1%, you don’t want to know… B- If I created a graph of number of people to percentage liked, the line would sit constantly at 100% and there’s nothing to say it should change if I were to extend the graph C- the time period was over 15 minutes, it was a crowded room
You: no, as in ‘you provided theses numbers after about 30 seconds of experimentation
Stranger: The test group was from complete strangers of varying social and cultural backgrounds, differing genders, differing ages, and everything
You: ill throw the ‘experimental error’ card whie we sort out more definitions.
Stranger: The age groups varied from foetal to dying
You: ‘attracted to’ means what hear?
Stranger: Are you asking me to define human attraction?
You: and you are yourself a man, no?
You: no, just that that is a non-objective definition.
Stranger: I’m claiming that every single human (and some non human) male in the universe is gay
Stranger: Attracted to the opposite sex in some manner, even to only one person (i.e. me)
You: attracted here being a synonym for ‘like’?
Stranger: So if you like me and are the same sex as me, you are gay
Stranger: And with the experiment it shows a trend for everybody liking me
Stranger: Thus I can deduce that everybody is gay
You: ok, so to parse it- you postulate that everyone in the universe is sexually attracted to you, even those who are male.
You: and you claim that because an imaginary group of 250 people are attravted to you, that everyone it?
Stranger: And I have tried to prove this through both experimental evidence
Stranger: SHUT UP THEY AREN’T IMAGINARY
You: you cannot proove anything. when i was asking for a proof earlier, i was thinking of a mathematical proof.
Stranger: Even logic is gay for me
You: so you extend the definition of gay to include those who use logic?
Stranger: I extend it to even the concept of logic
Stranger: Lmfao I love this
You: so gay = ‘anyone who is attracted to men or recognises the concept of logic’?
Stranger: WELL YOU CAN’T PROVE THAT YOU DON’T LIKE MEN LOGICALLY OR MATHEMATICALLY SO HAH
You: i can provide empirical evidence though
Stranger: Lol I’d love to finish this
Stranger: Nice chatting fine sir
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
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(148 votes, score: 4.74)